Happy New Year 2022

“Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm”

― Winston Churchill

“Life is a journey, not a destination”

-Anonymous

This mother fucking year is ON! Like it or not, time keeps rolling, we are not the center of the universe, the solar system, or the world. We are a blip in existence. Fucking embrace it. If the last two years have taught us anything, it has taught us life is short and death isn’t waiting for you to get your shit together. I want you to really consider this, “everyone is winging it.” Those at the top don’t know what they are doing they are making plans based on a hypothetical future outlook. Some of the smart ones look for patterns, they look at history, they look for data they can make sense of and take action on, but they are winging it the best they can. That is good news, if it is news to you. The truth is most of us feel like we suck, we feel incapable of getting anything done, or we are not good enough to actually pursue our dreams. Shit to be real, most of us do suck, we are incapable, and we aren’t good enough to pursue our dreams. But knowing those at the top are also fumbling their way to success should give you the audacity to try. AND when you fail, try again!

The saying, life is a journey, is fuel to let you know as long as you go on that is the point. There will be plenty of failures on the journey, plenty of mistakes, and wrong directions, and getting off the path, and danger. If you have something you want to do or be in life, be willing above all else to suck at it for a long time. Be enthusiastic when the failures come because that is how you learn, that is how you grow, that is how you learn what you truly value. If we listen to the doomsday experts- we have a fucking advantage over everyone else. Most people want to take the news of doom and gloom and hide away. They want to save themselves, they want to get really small and selfish. They don’t realize they are going to die anyway, they don’t see their short lives are marked by selfishness and greed; I’m looking at the anti-maskers and anti-vaxxers. We have the advantage of looking back on two years of a fucking pandemic, we know how to live, how to connect with others, and we are beginning to learn how much we need each other. We will see huge shifts and if we get our shit together we can actually do things that will make our lives better in the end.

If you want to write? Now, this year is the time to do it. If you want to spend time working on your art, that’s right baby, get after this time of isolation and focus. This is the perfect time to learn to meditate, to focus on your physical health, to work on the person you want to be. There is a world of new technologies and opportunities that you can learn about and mast at home, so quit waiting for permission and do something. This is also a perfect time to reach out and connect with those you love. There’s a myth that people would get together in person all the time before social media. That shit ain’t true. Some people would do it. The rest of us stayed home like we were in lockdown. But we would call each other, bullshit, and live. With social media, we can check in with each other in fun and interesting ways. Don’t be used by social media for advertising eyeballs, use that shit to connect with your people and enrich your life with connection.

Happy New Year my friends.

P.S. I have a lot of projects and plans for the first quarter of the year. I haven’t settled on a posting schedule yet, but I will be sure to post once a week. Later Gator!

Creativity is My Soul’s Connection To You.

Do you ever wonder why you can’t get it right?

Have you ever just tried so fucking hard to pursue a dream and it falls apart. Every effort fails, every effort crashes like the ocean on the rocks. It is the unborn egg consumed by a predator for a meal just to make it to the next meal. In this life I believe we are all capable of doing interesting things that sets our souls on fire. I believe most of us settle for entertainment instead of risking our ego through creation. We live through someone else’s art. We let them put in the work, we let them risk their sense of self; all while we hide away and put our efforts into earning a living. Instead of living, we just exist. We trade what our souls long to be for what society lets us be.

The truth is, it is up to us to reach out. To let our souls create. To light the path for others. This paradox calls for us to set ourselves on fire, to both see and be a light. But you might say to me, “Nino, no one cares about my art.” The FUCK YOU say! You care! Your soul cares and your soul in my opinion is connected to every soul and in that every soul breathes with your creation. But here is the thing by doing what you do you… Maybe not your art, but by creating, you become an inspiration. And the better you get at making your art, the more of an inspiration you become, because the quality of your art. (All artists care about the quality of their art)

Creating art, writing, making things that put us out there directly and indirectly is what makes us artists; not the quality, not the quantity, the act of doing it alone. And once someone who doesn’t consider themselves creative does creates, their soul feasts for the first time and they want more. I am not talking about paint by numbers I am talking about expression, making something you love and dancing in the light of your own cleverness. The loop of inspiration begins when we let ourselves be free to make what we want and say what we believe to be true.

Here’s the thing, you won’t succeed at making your art if you are looking to others for permission to have your own dreams, goals, or ambitions. You won’t be an artist if all you do is copy. Because even if you succeed you will only be a copy, and you my friend are an original. Life has given you a story, passions, skills, ability, insights, and much more to make impactful art. You will succeed when you give in to your creative urge and make the art your soul longs for. That is when we learn, even if things fall apart, we are enthusiastic to start again because it is all a part of the process and the road to our creative success. That is when we own the dream because we allowed ourselves to become dreamers.

Nino.

Teaching Boys To Be Men

Before the automobile was invented, it wasn’t a mark of masculinity to be able to fix one. In fact, working on cars isn’t one. Our society has replaced character and values for manly replicas. Dudes who workout in the gym and are super buff, guys who work on cars or with their hands, guys who fight MMA, or the stupidest one of all guys who shoot guns. These things in someone’s mind are masculine attributes. This dumb shit blows my mind. The simple reason is they are not gender specific and can be enjoyed by anyone. A penis is not a difference maker.

When I think back to the good old days, I think about men who weren’t allowed to have feelings. I think back to men who were only allowed to have one feeling anger. Shit, they couldn’t even feel remorse. Those men weren’t allowed to look at their family like we do today with love and compassion, although I know they did. For these men, their families were extensions of themselves, they were property, workers, and daughters held less value than sons. The family dynamic back then was destroyed because capitalism ruled everything. Everyone carried a monetary value. They took what it meant to be a family and turned it into a work force. Because of that they had no problem putting children to work in sweatshops all across the land. On top of that not everyone had a father to guide them, poverty made sure of that. But I digress. Men back in the days were allowed to get angry and beat their wives. They could do that, but not crying. The only painful emotion they could show was anger, not tears; oh, that is manly, get angry like the Hulk. “I had never seen my Father cry.” common phrase. That’s fucking sad, it is fucking sad, that they never learned from their fathers how to feel. How to express emotions, how to mourn, how to feel life, they never learned sorrow, regret, joy, love, tenderness. Instead, they were taught by example to be tough. When in pain they were verbally told to suck it up; as if that helped. They said “Be a man.” like that was a thing to strive for.

But what is it to teach a boy to be a man? It is bullshit. It is not your job as a parent, role model, or teacher to teach boys to be men, it is your FUCKING job to teach them to be themselves. To be reliable, authentic, and moral in all situations. To be responsible and self confident, to believe that they can strive for their dreams. To teach them that people aren’t there to be used, but appreciated and cared for. To endure hardship and pain isn’t a masculine trait, it is a human one and it is what we do when we are climbing our own hardest mountains. We teach children to suck it up because it doesn’t last and they are tough, no matter what gender they are. You see teaching boys to be men is just teaching one person what you think the culture expects of them. You teach them to be a fucking replica, when what we need are individuals who can get along and work together for all our good. We need stand out pillars in our communities. Not thoughtless, feelingless, macho men who don’t know how to comfort, care, and pave a way for a better future; one not paved through violence but through compassion and empathy.

The simple truth is we need to teach everyone to be a good person. Masculine traits will rise up, feminine traits will rise up, genderless traits will rise up when we allow people to be themselves. Values such as love, sacrifice, compassion, unity, ambition, joy, humor, creativity, truth; when those are taught, then the body, no matter shape, size, or look, will be filled with an admirable character. That matters across the board: Female, male, gender fluid, and non-binary.

So, please stop teaching your boys that being an asshole is what it means to be a man. Teach them to be themselves.

Nino